Don't judge a book by the cover. Judge them by their handshake.
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My Christmas shopping is finished, and like a smug prick, I’m now going on the internet to tell everyone about it.
LinkedIn is so terrible, I cannot even think of a proper, clever way to insult it. Do you realize how incredible that is? I, someone…
With the benefit of hindsight, maybe I shouldn't have eaten undercooked food.